sweeneytad:

*dentist slaughters family in front of you*

they’re bleeding because you don’t floss

(via thecoldestsound)

meladoodle:

no no no officer you don’t understand, this is medicinal meth

(via jackiejustbreathe)

— Bill Cosby (via your-art-is-showing)

thernardier:

“you wanna see my breasts” i say seductively to my boyfriend. i unbutton my shirt to reveal two large, succulent cuts of meat. i am a chicken. why do i have a boyfriend. why am i wearing clothes

(Source: kawhoru, via jackiejustbreathe)

growlithed:

the venn diagram of guys i like and guys i cant have is a circle

(via beyoncebeytwice)